How to Trust Again

Learning to Trust After Betrayal

Learning to trust after betrayal is a painful and difficult process for many, especially when the subversion of trust is compounded with a legacy of similar occurrences. Who among us has not in some way felt mislead, lied to or deceived by someone they loved? Such events make one question the probability of ever finding a person in who to completely trust.

The wounds reopened from previous attacks on our hope and the innocent belief in a safe person or soul friend fester. It seems for many not enough time or nurturing precedes the next bombardment of being let down. It is hard to believe in a true friend or love after years pass and the belief begins to seem naive and almost delusional. We begin perhaps to think ...this is life, life is loss and pain and in the same breath it becomes almost more depressing to come to this conclusion. So we wrestle, secretly hoping and then returning to self-chastisement for the folly of letting ourselves go back to this childhood myth of goodness and justice, fairness and truth. It is a challenge to reconcile the good real moments of human valor and virtue with the unpleasantness of our shadow selves, the side of us all capable of great selfishness and evil. So what protection is there from the truth that we are both blessed and cursed to be these split and segmented human beings? Why not angels? Why so dark at times? It is a purgatory of sentiment to trust, to fear, to hope, and to realize.

So how can we trust again when we know that there is no guarantee that we will not suffer yet another laceration upon the once pure innocent heart born with us and aged with us? We seasoned warriors of the heart; how the pain of betrayal and unrequited love does still sting with the memories we are still held captive by. Wounded warriors in the trenches of love, loss, life and learning walled away from attack, naked and vulnerable. Love, friendships, trust all become fearful concepts painful to hope for.

So, rather than focusing on trusting another person we must first trust from the core and return to a higher love, friendship and union. Trust in yourself, love yourself and even better if you can find it in your heart believe in a power greater than yourself and learn to trust in that. This is the primary and most sacred relationship. It is in this infallible union that men and women have been able to overcome great odds and betrayals by mankind but have been able to persevere and even love. One of the greatest teachers of love who ever walked the earth once said “forgive them they know not what they do” Great saints and sages steadfast in love of their maker have been able to extend peaceful compassion to even the darkest man. This is great power.

Compare this thought with those with which we began only moments ago in the inception of this treatise and see the vast energetic difference you feel within. To love, to have true love you must learn to love first and trust yourself. You must feel deep within your heart that no matter who hurts you, lies to you, or betrays you it cannot and can never tarnish nor take away the sacred bond you have with your true and higher self and with that which created all and exists beyond and before your existence.

When we can have the courage to love ourselves, and know we are loved beyond ourselves, this is a great transcendental key to transformation. In this way we need no longer lament past the pain or seek a person to free us from it. You are this very soul who is here to teach you about love, the part of you that is pure love that which exists in all things. With this as your soul foundation, why would you want for more?

Stay firm and hold fast to the true reality beyond the veil of this temporal and unsteady realm. Go beyond the lifetime of pain and see lifetimes of infinite love. When learning to trust again we must see that it is we who have fallen short of the measure of love we seek to fulfill. Our number one love and focus is not on some event or other person at all but rather on something much greater. When entangled in the mire of worldly confusion, you have subjected yourself to the distortion and not the other way around. Who has deceived who?

Awaken yourself to the great realization that trust and love begin within, deep within to the home of the great spark of life that created you.